Monday, December 6

Hans Meyer sayings

  • The best sayings from Hans Meyer

    The best sayings from Hans Meyer

    Whether in Nuremberg, at Hertha BSC or at Borussia Mönchengladbach: Hans Meyer enjoys cult status everywhere. In addition to his sporting successes, the soccer teacher owes this primarily to his legendary sayings. We have put together the best of them on the occasion of Meyer’s 79th birthday:

  • “The butter cake here is really excellent. Frau Demuth must have baked it.” (At a press conference in St. Pauli, Hamburg’s trainer was Dietmar Demuth)

  • “He’s been learning the German language for two years now and can already say ‘Guten Tag’.” (Via his Ghanaian striker Lawrence Aidoo)

  • “I can’t say that now. Otherwise I’ll have problems when my wife arrives on Christmas Eve with the package with the fine rib underwear.” (When asked whether the draw at Bayern was the best Christmas present)

  • “Of course there are some really mad at me. Do you think the twelfth man or those who have to go to the stands come to me every day and bring me a basket of eggs and we meet and kiss?” (When asked about the mood in the team)

  • “Perhaps two of the 25 journalists in Gladbach have recognized the value of Tomáš Galásek. He hardly scores any goals and is also not Marko Marin, who plays four men on three square meters, whereupon the fans rightly begin to masturbate with joy. But he decides about the quality of letting your teammates shine. ” (After resigning from Borussia in 2009)

  • “If I drank a whole bottle of Little Red Riding Hood, my wife got pregnant regularly afterwards.”

  • “I find the fact that 3000 of our fans were in St. Pauli remarkable. And of them at most 2000 were there because of the Reeperbahn.” (After his first away game as Borussia coach)

  • “I’ve now gone down in history as a cup winner in the GDR and in the West. About time, there aren’t that many of us anymore.” (After winning the cup with Nuremberg in 2007)

  • “From next April I will no longer go on vacation, take a shower every day, train myself and wait for the decisive call. Because, as the season has shown, the trend is towards one-day coaches.” (In June 2009 about Jupp Heynckes’ brief engagement in Munich)

  • “You will still be annoyed when we really get up. Then no one will watch your show any more.” (In Gladbach’s second division times to a “DSF” reporter)

  • “Look, I’m a communist by nature, that is, I’m poor by nature.” (When he started work in Mönchengladbach)

  • “With such a clear vote, I did not have the opportunity to manipulate the election. However, if it had turned out to be diametrically opposed to my ideas, I would have claimed that it was only a trial vote.” (On the election of Tomáš Galásek as FCN captain)

  • “Football has a status with us that is not allowed – for that little bit of ass shaking.”

  • “I had to read that Meyer was interested in classical music. Everyone who knows me laughs half sick! My wife is more responsible for cultural matters.”

  • “We had to interrupt training for half an hour because the players were so happy. Some even cried.” (After his contract extension in Mönchengladbach)

  • “If you play football, then the job no longer lets you free. You uproot a bit socially. Go to the theater in the evening if you’ve lost three times. You are a freak in the mood.” (About the disadvantages of being a coach)

  • “You know, you can always disturb me during sexual intercourse, but when it comes to eating it just sucks!” (To Nuremberg fans)

  • “Goalkeeper Jörg Stiel once said I was his best coach. I later found out that he only had two.”

  • “I have already spoken to him and assured him that our close cooperation will continue.” (At his last signature in Gladbach about his dog Aldo)

  • “I told Möhlmann beforehand that we could agree on a division of points. But the bastard didn’t go along with that.” (After a home defeat against Arminia Bielefeld and coach Benno Möhlmann)

  • “We go into the forest with torches at night so that the boys lose their fear.” (Before a FCN game in Dortmund)

  • “Only 20 percent of the players adhere to the coach’s instructions when they are on vacation. At least 50 percent relax according to the motto: ‘If you move, you will be shot.'”

  • “There are five really stupid players in every squad. One of them would definitely end up under the bridge if he wasn’t playing football.”

  • “Football is always the same when it comes to regularity.”

  • “He came into our dressing room after the 2-2 draw and wanted to change his jersey. So I said to him: ‘You won’t get one. You will have thousands of them next season.’ He didn’t laugh. Failed the exam – he has no sense of humor. ” (When asked why Daniel Felgenhauer does not move to Gladbach)

  • “In football, it’s easy to build a memorial for you, but you pee on it just as quickly.”

  • “It was no longer a coincidence that I later got a contract extension at Twente. Obviously they were so impressed by my beauty.” (In the “Zeit” about his engagement in Holland)

  • “We got it under control very late, but by then the crow was already dead.” (After a 5-0 defeat in Leverkusen)

  • “My wife didn’t let me into the garden because I couldn’t tell the roses from the cauliflower.” (About his return to the Bundesliga)

  • “Until 1990 I didn’t work for money, but for socialism.”

  • “In Cologne they locked the office for four days and uncorked a bottle of sparkling wine every half hour when they sold Toni Polster to Gladbach for 1.8 million marks.” (Via transfer coups)

  • “The players come at nine in the morning, drink coffee, have a chat, then a small team meeting, 90 minutes of training, an hour of follow-up. And in the afternoon they go to the Kö in Düsseldorf with their mum. They can go shopping while others are still on standing by the machine. As a football professional, you have a wonderful time. ” (about the dream job of a professional footballer)

  • “The training ground was my sanctuary here. Groundsman Erich Hage pulled the weeds with secateurs. If a raven settled on the lawn, it was shot.” (About old Jena times)

  • “It’ll be a nice trip home. One point and the boys weren’t with their mother for a week.” (on the situation after the 1: 1 Mönchengladbach in Stuttgart)

  • “Igor has had an exhausting week and only came home yesterday. His daughter may not have let him sleep. I don’t even want to talk about his wife.” (Via Igor Demo)

  • “If I’m in the safe midfield with the Christmas system, then we can talk about it. But after a game day I’ll be careful not to keep my head out of the window that far. But if you write that Hans Meyer won all by himself, then you’re right, of course. ” (After a win against Bayern Munich in the first game of the season)

  • “When I became a trainer in Jena when I was just 28 years old, it hit like a bomb. It was like an 18-year-old becoming a referee and then coming out of athletics.” (About the circumstances of his signature at Carl Zeiss Jena)

  • “The only difference between the Netherlands and Franconia is that here in Franconia almost nobody goes on vacation with a caravan”

  • “I’ve never scored a point there. Maybe it would be better if I call in sick.”

  • “I can’t get old enough to be able to cope with all the surprises that football has to offer.”


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